sjsmith.com.au - blog

Lessons we all need

Crafting an Imperfect Life

It's been a very odd few weeks.  On the surface it looks like the wheels have come off. I've got virtually nothing done beyond the barest of essentials. I've not managed any creative time, my house looks like the digs of some drunk college students and I haven't done any exercise in nearly a week and a half. That being said its been a wonderful time in many ways. I've spent more time with my husband and dog than I normally would, I've spent afternoons laying on the couch watching daytime TV and I've eaten what I felt like without guilt or remorse.  So what's the big catalyst for all of this slothful indulgence. I had a breast cancer scare! A family history puts me in the high risk category for breast cancer so I have been having breast screening for many years. My last mammogram came back with some "irregularities" and I was called for extra screening. In the days leading up to the tests I found myself hugging my breasts like beloved teddie bears.

Having seen family go through mastectomies I was all too aware of what negative results could mean and I don't mind telling you I was scared shitless!  Of course you know that the tests came back negative and on returning home I kind of collapsed in a heap. I didn't realise how tightly wound I'd been until it was all over. I didn't like to be too enthused while still at the screening centre as I was really mindful that were still half a dozen women waiting for further tests (I'm sending them good thoughts that they also came out with an all clear!). It took me a few days to find my equilibrium again. But at the end of it I felt, not just lucky to not have cancer, but also, lucky to have the life I do!  I may not be the poster child for productivity and maybe I'm an absolute turtle when it comes to making lasting changes in my life but, things get done - eventually!  I feel so fortunate to have been given this lesson. If you're giving yourself a hard time for not being all that you think you should, ease off a bit. It may not be a perfect life but an imperfect one can be pretty wonderful too!

Till next time,  

Sarah-Jane X